Build Up, Never Break Down

By: Missionary Team
Picture this: you’ve just arrived at school, hurrying to your class, when you trip on an open locker and drop all of your books, and your response is to scold the person who left their locker open with blaming, insults, and swearing. Growing up, a situation like that in school would be considered acceptable, or even the appropriate response.

No matter how many times I saw scenarios like that in school, work, or even out in public, something deep down always tugged at me that treating each other in such a negative way never helped anyone or strengthened relationships. I now strive to use positive language in order to build people, not negative language to break people down, and I want to show you all how you can use it as well.

The Effects of Negative Language:
I used to work at a supermarket for about two years, and every day I was there, I had a front row seat to watch a sea of profanities come out of not only my co-workers but also customers as well, and these actions caused a great gap from good customer/employee relationships. I used to observe these heated conversations, and would watch as customers would regularly get into arguments with my co-workers.

After most of these conflicts, I’d see the customers that got into arguments less and less in the store. A good takeaway that I learned, which maybe you can use as well, was to take a step back and watch what the people around me were saying, and observe if it was creating bonds or creating divides between them.

The Effects of Positive Language:
From all the observing I did at my job, I became much more aware of just how much people talked to each other in such a negative way in every part of my life, college, family, friends, etc. I saw so much tension around me that I decided to try using positive words and affirmations when talking, and I would watch for the results of my actions. When at work, I would always help customers patiently, thank them for shopping, and wish them a good day, and nine-out-of-ten times that attitude would make the customer’s day.

This method worked so well, that an elderly woman once told me that she would make me a jar of homemade jelly! I didn’t just reserve this way of speaking for my job, but would apply it to my family, friends, and classmates, then it led to the formation of deeper relationships. I encourage everyone reading this to use only positive and constructive language when talking to the people we interact with day by day, and the results will always show themselves, as they did when I tried to speak positively.

In Conclusion...
I deeply hope you all may get something out of my story, and that it may awaken just how powerful positive words and encouragement can be in your life. Remember to observe the interactions of our everyday lives, and replace the negative with positive to strengthen the bonds with both those we know and strangers alike.

Use this method, but please keep in mind that it is not a perfect process, I have even failed and continue to fail at speaking positively more times than I can remember. When faced with failure, always remember that Christ desires of us to treat our neighbors and even our enemies as ourselves, and being able to pick ourselves from being rejected or stumbling to reach out to another is appreciated in God’s eyes.