Injured and Afraid
By: Missionary Team
There once was a doe-eyed teenager who had the world at her fingertips. Every ounce of her being existed for the sake of competition and teamwork. Every day of her life was filled with running, basketball, softball, and any other sport that was around. It was her existence. On a cold October day, with the colorful leaves glistening from the rain and the sight of her breath leaving her lips, her doe-eyes would change forever. She geared up for her race -shoes tied tight, under armor on underneath her XC uniform, and the gloves she wore would come off just before the gun would signal. This race was unique and a race she would never forget. The course was hard, starting with a hundred-yard sprint and continuing up a hill that almost seemed like it would never end, followed by hills and valleys covered in mud and water from the rain that hadn’t stopped all week. Somewhere along the way, her foot started to feel funny. It didn’t snap. It wasn’t broken. But wow did it hurt.
For two weeks, she ran on that funny feeling foot, hoping to finish the season well. Instead, her last race was the worst she had run in her two years of XC, limping almost the entire time from the excruciating pain. Hardly being able to walk, she knew it was time for her to go to the doctor. When the Doctors told her her foot was stress fractured, she figured she’d be ready in 4-6 weeks to start the next sports season of basketball a little late; however, weeks turned months, and months turned to years. The doctors didn’t know why her pain was increasing, they didn’t know why her foot was abnormally inflamed, and they didn’t know why there was discoloration radiating up her leg. The doctors didn’t know. And this left her injured and afraid.
This story was of me. A young doe-eyed girl whose entire existence was to compete, to play on a team, to be an athlete. That’s who I was. But in high school, that was stripped away from me. I grew afraid and angry, which led to isolation and hopelessness. Working out was an escape for me -from my family who constantly argued, from my depression that I was too afraid to talk about, and from every other reality that I didn’t want to look at. And just like that, it was gone and I had to look at some of the hardest parts of me. I was afraid.
If you’ve ever been injured, like a career-ending injury, you know the plethora of emotions that can run through you at any given time. You understand the fear and the anger and the disappointment and the belief that no one understands. You get it. And I get it. And I want you to know that you aren’t alone. Not only are you not alone, but you have a God that is vastly greater than this injury. Most importantly, you can be free now. You can be free in knowing that your worth doesn’t come from sports. You can be free in knowing that life isn’t always a competition. You can be free in knowing that there are greater things in store for you. There is freedom here. I know this is hard to hear. It’s taken me years to come to this place of realizing that God actually saved my life by giving me an injury. But I promise you, God isn’t finished with you yet. This injury is not your end, it’s merely the beginning of something far greater than anything you could have imagined. God’s vision for your life is just beginning, so have hope, love free, and be not afraid.
