There is Peace in Christ and Running

By: Maria Abbe

I didn’t know much about running. In fact, the most running I’d done was chasing a soccer ball up and down a field a few years prior during high school. It was my sophomore year at Belmont Abbey College and a few of my girlfriends were on the cross-country team. I wanted to spend time with them. So, we ran.

What my friends didn’t know, however, was that I was struggling with anxiety, depression, and an eating disorder. I had struggled with these things for a while, having been diagnosed in high school, and I was still navigating therapy, recovery, and how to function in college without letting my mental health derail my future. Needless to say, I was going through a lot, but I enjoyed our time running the trails together.

The summer before my senior year in college (about two years after I’d met my new friends and started casually running with them), I wasn’t in a good place. I was in a tumultuous relationship, struggling with anxiety and depression, and unsure of who I was.

Then, one day during that summer, I was sitting on my parents’ couch scrolling through Facebook. A picture popped up of a girl that I knew, and immediately the anxious thoughts rushed in, “She’s so pretty. I’m not good enough. She has such a great personality. I can hardly function with all this anxiety. She has so many friends. I’m losing friends because of this relationship.” And they went on and on until, for the first time, I found myself in a full-blown panic attack.

I couldn’t calm myself down. My mom couldn’t either. So, she called my brother (who was a firefighter at the time) and he hurried over with some of his firefighter friends. They couldn’t calm me down, and the next thing I knew, I was rushed to the hospital in an ambulance.

That pivotal moment changed my life forever. After going to the hospital, I dove deep (with the love and support of my family) into therapy.

One day during that same summer, I was feeling particularly anxious and without knowing what else to do, I laced up my sneakers and went on a run. Unbeknownst to me as I headed out the door, the path I chose was a five-mile route. Halfway through, I realized that if I turned around or if I kept going forward, it was the same distance.

So, in that moment, my mantra became, “You can’t look back anymore. You have to keep moving forward.” And so I did. I ran five miles that day, and as I was running, I felt the anxiety melt away. For the first time, my racing thoughts matched my racing body.

I felt relief. I felt calm. I felt accomplished.

From that point forward, running became a crucial tool in my mental health toolkit. Running, coupled with cognitive behavioral therapy, launched me on a healing process I hadn’t experienced before.

Did it make all of my mental health issues instantly go away? Nope. Do I still struggle at times with anxiety? Yup. But what it has helped me with all of these years is finding a sense of purpose, relieving anxiety during tough moments, bringing joy, and ultimately, coming closer to Christ.

All throughout the Bible, we see comparisons of the Christian life to running. (Two of my favorite verses are 1 Corinthians 9:25 and Hebrews 12:1.) Why is that so? I believe it’s because running, particularly running a race, elicits the whole spectrum of emotions and feelings, and the only way to finish that race is to persevere until the end.

If we take the same approach to our lives as Christians, we know we must continue on, despite what’s presented to us, with trust in Christ, growth in virtue, and deep joy. It’s not always easy, but as Christians, we can do hard things. We have a Savior who has redeemed us by His blood and calls us into communion with Him.

And that is the cause of our joy.

Running is a part of me now. Running helps me clear my head and understand unstable situations. Running brings me joy and helps me muddle through tough emotions.

Ultimately, running brings me closer to Christ and His everlasting peace.

Maria Abbe is the founder of RunningMyselfTogether, a ministry dedicated to bringing Christ’s light to women through running and mental health awareness. She is a cradle Catholic who discovered her worth in Christ while working through her eating disorder recovery. She now writes, speaks, coaches runners, and leads pilgrimages to help women understand who they are as daughters of God and eradicate the stigma around mental health in the Church. You can find Maria at www.runningmyselftogether.com and on Facebook and Instagram.